Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Blonde Moment

Have you ever had a "blonde moment"? Having had a few today, I think its kind of funny that they call it a blonde moment. Why not a brunette moment? or a redhead moment? I know redheads and brunettes who are ditzy. And where did that word come from anyway? Ditzy. Is it even a word?

Being a blonde (or at least one who refuses to let her darker roots take over as she gets older), I resent the blonde moment. I mean, I'm smart, or like to think I am. I have a college degree from a fine university in Western PA (back me up on this Berk) and a job title that say I'm smart...or at least suggest I could be.

So why is it that I can't I walk and chew gum at the same time? Why is it when I return to my office from getting a soda for myself and a coworker, I go to the wrong entrance of my office because I was reading the label on my Diet Dr. Pepper? (Oh yes, this blonde reads.) Why do my heels constantly get stuck in the little cracks of the sidewalks, so much so that I walk right out of them? Why do I trip while walking across a flat surface? Why do I sit at my desk with headphones on, but no music playing? Why do I head out in my car, start to think about something and end up somewhere I had no intention of going? Is it just because I'm blonde? Maybe its because I make fun of people for wearing the wrong outfit, or the wrong shoes, or because they look funny. Could this be God or some other higher power getting back at me? "You just made fun of that girl, now you must trip over nothing." Hmmm...

I personally like to think that I have so much going on in my brain that sometimes the motor-skills and other rational brain functions take a back seat to everything else. Yeah, that's it...sounds good anyway.

I guess I'd rather have them be blonde moments than "senior" moments.


At 4:35 PM, Blogger Kristin said...

Heck if I know. I have my own share of "blonde moments" and my hair's kind of red. I'm feeling pretty stupid today, though. I just failed the foreign service oral assessment. Definitely not my brightest achievement.

At 4:41 PM, Blogger Kayla said...

So, I was born a brunette, highlighted my hair blond (what's with the e at the end, anyway?!) for 12 years and just went back - au natural. I have been an idiot through all of that. I fall down A LOT more than you do (and sometimes, I fall up... like at the Nationals game - when I fell up the SAME stair 4 times in a row). Oh... another time, when running, I tripped (was running downhill) and not only did I not catch myself, I rolled completely down the hill (it was a sidewalk, with people on it - WHO HAD TO MOVE OUT OF MY WAY). What a site!! MMH, I think it makes us more loveable. It's physical comedy baby.

At 4:42 PM, Blogger MMH said...

At least you passed the written part...that says a lot!!! I'd get lost on the way to TAKE the test!

At 4:45 PM, Blogger DireWolf said...

Smoke less weed. Drink less beer. Save more brain cells. ;)

At 4:46 PM, Blogger MMH said...

I spell blonde with an "e" and you don't. That's what makes us different. Among other things. Not an incorrect spelling...just alternative.

At 5:26 PM, Blogger Kristin said...

Do you think that "blonde moment" precedes Marilyn Monroe? She did market on her platinum locks and ditzy demeanor.

Dictionary.com even lists it:
Definition: an instance of acting dumb or scatterbrained; momentary forgetfulness or ditziness
Example: Britney Spears was having another blonde moment.
Etymology: from the stereotype that blondes have less than average intelligence

At 5:29 PM, Blogger DireWolf said...

Dumb blonde
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.

Dumb blonde is a stereotype, typically applied to women with blond hair color, which achieved a degree of prominence in popular usage. Several notable actresses have (usually unfairly) been labelled "dumb blondes", Marilyn Monroe and Suzanne Somers (due to her role as Chrissy Snow on Three's Company) being perhaps two of the most notable examples. Dolly Parton is an example of a singer who used this image to her own benefit, singing songs such as "Dumb Blonde". Goldie Hawn is best known for playing a dumb blonde in several roles, including the stage persona she used on Laugh-In. The bimbo is an extreme form of the dumb blonde.

There is a common category of jokes that employ the dumb-blonde stereotype for their effect. They usually have a blonde asking the other a very stupid question, only to give an even more stupid answer herself.

There have been conscious efforts to subvert the stereotype with blond female fictional characters who are intelligent and appropriately serious in demeanor, such as the character Betty Cooper from Archie Comics, Buffy Summers (the title character of Buffy The Vampire Slayer), and Jennifer Marlowe, the secretary from WKRP in Cincinnati (played by Loni Anderson).

Essex girl

Local variants of the dumb-blonde stereotype (involving the same jokes and much the same use in popular culture) include the United Kingdom's Essex girl — a young, working class woman with an unsophisticated attitude to life. The sterotypical Essex girl wears a short skirt and high heels, and has bleached blonde hair, often pulled back in a severe style sometimes called an Essex facelift. She drinks Diamond White, a very strong cider, which makes her loud and vulgar. Nobody laughs harder at an Essex girl joke than she does. She wears white slingbacks and drives a white Ford Fiesta. Essex girl is the female counterpart of Essex man; both came into currency during the 1980s property boom, when sectors of British society enjoyed an affluence hitherto reserved for the middle classes. Latterly the Essex girl image has waned, to be replaced in part by chavette.

Steve Coogan's character Pauline Calf is a prime example of Essex girl.

Valley girl

Made popular by the portrayal of Alicia Silverstone and Stacey Dash in Amy Heckerling's Clueless, a valley girl is a spoiled brat, usually with wealthy parents and an active but superficial social life. They live in the San Fernando Valley area of Los Angeles and use unique words and expressions (such as grody to the max, and the excessive use of totally and like), which became known as Valspeak.

Frank Zappa sung about these girls in his song "valley girl", his daughter Moon Unit Zappa took care of the nonsense Valspeak during the song.

At 5:49 PM, Blogger another random guy said...

Frank Zappa!? I LOVE that guy!

"I wanna funky little Jewish Princess.."

this is going south in a hurry -- 7 comments and now it's "Joe's Garage."

At 5:57 PM, Blogger MMH said...

Damn, I'm sorry I posted.

At 6:00 PM, Blogger Berk said...

Everyone talks about dumb blondes, but the other day I met a nice smart blonde. She was a golden retriever.

Biologists have discovered a new owl species called the Blonde Owl. Instead of saying "whoo, whoo", the Blonde Owl says "whaaaaaaaaaat?".

One time I hit on this cute blonde in a bar. I went up to her and said "Penny for your thoughts?". She gave me change.

Please don't forget to tip your bartender.

At 6:26 PM, Blogger DireWolf said...

What's the blonde mating call?

"Oh . . . my . . . god, I am soooooooo drunk!"

At 8:20 PM, Blogger Asian Mistress said...

People tell me I must be a blonde. It's OK, don't worry about it - we all have our moments, blonde or not!

At 9:47 PM, Blogger chantilly said...

a sounding good blonde! wanna have dinner tomorrow?

At 10:28 PM, Blogger heidi said...

This guy was dating a blonde and said, "hey, honey come out here and stand behind the car and tell me if the hazard lights work." She stood behind the car and said, "Now they work. Now they don't. Now they work. Now they don't. Now they work...."

I will be here all week. Try the veal, it's delicious.

At 11:35 PM, Blogger Berk said...

Thanks to my buddy RK for this timely tidbit. Not sure if he reads this blog (guessing not since he hasn't hazed me about it yet), but this showed up in my inbox tonight...

BlondeStar , a spoof of the GM OnStar commercials (but no doubt similar incidents have happened in real life).

At 1:34 PM, Blogger another random guy said...

Ah, yes. Blonds and cars...

A mechanic is working at his service station, when a blond pushing her car comes in to the service area, sweating profusely and clearly in distress.

"I don't know what happened, it just stopped working. Can you fix it?"

"Sure," he says, and he sets to working on the disabled car.

About an hour later, the mechanic says, "You're all set."

"What was wrong with it?"

"Crap in the carburator," says he.

"Really? How often do I have to do that?"

At 2:55 AM, Blogger blondestella said...

Dumb Bleached Brunettes talking about their Dumb Bleached Brunette lives.



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